|Dancing Maiden by Katarina Silva|
This past weekend I met a radiant young woman who has a beautifully open heart. We encountered each other a few times and engaged in pleasant and polite conversations about art and other things, and about not limiting ourselves with language (this lesson I have learned from one of my teachers and in turn try to pass it along to others). I saw her dance and smile and each time I was filled with joy at being witness to her first steps upon a path that I have loved for many years now.
It brings great light to my heart to hope that I will be walking this path with her and that thought inspires me to remember that the Maiden lives within me as well, even as I take my first steps into my life as a Crone.
On the last evening of the weekend I found myself engaged again in conversation with this Bright Child and as will sometimes happen, the conversation went somewhere that I did not expect and rather than politely restraining myself, I dove in head first and followed where my heart and mind led.
It was a wonderful feeling but after, I felt as though I should be embarrassed that I had been “too loud” and “too big” in expressing my thoughts and in engaging so enthusiastically and completely. Indeed I was surprised at my behavior.
The next morning I was given the gift of hearing the perceptions that some in my community have of me, specifically that I am never loud or big and while I was not criticized for my unusual behavior it was remarked upon for its rarity.
I learned a few things from this experience. First was recognition of the feeling that I should be ashamed for being “too loud or too big”. (One of my teachers will be very pleased to know that I am no longer going to unconsciously accept that premise.) It is not cause for shame to be engaged fully and enthusiastically with others.
Another lesson I have learned from this experience is that the Maiden is alive and well within me. My sisters on this path embody the Maiden even as they welcome me into the Sisterhood of the Crone. They are full of life and joy and adventure and I am grateful for their companionship and guidance.
I give thanks for the Maiden Encountered and for the Maiden Remembered and for the Maiden Reborn within me.